The Most Important Relationship In Your Life

The quality of your relationship with yourself is the foundation of your relationships with others.

Studies show that we unable to be emotionally available for others if we are not able to be emotionally connected with ourselves.

For example: If we ignore our feelings, strive for perfection, criticise ourselves, reject parts of our personality, and not give ourselves the space to take care of our mind, body and spirit then these are signs of unhealthy self-relationships.

In this instance we are unlikely to build caring, kind and loving relationships with others.

A healthy self-relationship is based on strong senses of self-worth, self-respect, unconditional self-love and self-acceptance.

Here are some tips on how to start building a healthy relationship with yourself right now:

– care for your physical needs (e.g. get enough sleep and rest, eat healthy food, exercise daily, breathe fresh air, and be around nature)

– notice your emotions, thoughts, physical feelings, behaviour, mood

– compliment yourself and keep yourself in high, positive regard

– do what you love and what inspires you

Check in with yourself daily and ask: What’s happening with me right now?

An exceptionally good self-relationship should be your number one priority! Treat yourself with love, care and respect.

How To Attract Only The Right People To Your Life

Have you ever acted against your own will to maintain relationships with people you considered valuable to you? Did it work?

The ability to create and protect our own boundaries is a vital part of building powerful relationships.

You might ask why some people succeed in keeping their boundaries, but others fail.

It is because people with low self-esteem tend to keep soft boundaries or not have them at all, because they value relationships with others more than their self-worth.

They allow others to take advantage of their personal boundaries too easily because they are afraid of being rejected or abandoned.

But if you want to become irresistibly confident and build powerful, fulfilling relationships then you have to create boundaries that will serve you to bring only the right people into your life!

For instance, you must state to yourself: “I don’t want anyone to shout at me, so if somebody does start shouting, I will leave the conversation.”

Or: “I will not tolerate someone betraying me. I will finish that relationship.”

It is a pure, adult behaviour to say clearly what is right or wrong for you, so we don’t have to feel guilty afterwards.

Think about it this way: If you don’t respect your boundaries, why would anyone else respect them?

Ask yourself:
‒ What is it that I cannot accept?
‒ How am I going to protect my boundaries?
‒ How am I going to communicate them?
‒ How committed am I?

Once you are clear about your personal boundaries and start behaving accordingly, it will make an amazing difference.

You will be able to build powerful relationships based on trust, support and equality.

Do Men Have More Insecurities Than Women?

Parents treat boys and girls differently from the beginning.

Girls are allowed to cry, be weak, helpless and capricious…

BUT – boys are not!

One family member will always remind them: “You are boy, you have to be strong!”

At a very young age, boys learn to numb their feelings; not showing them to anyone and pretending to be powerful.

Starting from puberty, boys begin to appreciate “men must-have” attributes such as:

– leadership
– dominance
– law-breaking
– muscle development
– actually, everything that’s associated with power!

But what if a boy has less-developed muscles or doesn’t want to be involved in any illegal activity?

In most cases, he doesn’t feel like he fits in and might be bullied by more “mature” friends.

And what impact does all of this have?

This leads to anger, fear, suppressed resentment, and other psychological reservations.

What happens next?

As an adult, men encounter other challenges, such as their parents’ expectations:

– “You have to become someone!”
– “You have to be financially independent!”
– “You have to find a ‘real’ job!”
– “You have to be a breadwinner”, etc…

Such a heavy bag of societal preconceptions of what a “real man” must be or do, isn’t it?

I believe that regardless of gender, we all have a right to experience and express a whole variety of feelings and to be vulnerable.

Let’s stop hiding our insecurities behind masks. Let’s face them and resolve them.

We are free from labels, stereotypes and the expectations of others unless WE want to take them on!

You are what you believe you are.

P.S. Do what you love, even if this goes against the common picture of a “real man”.